Projects > Story-of-the-Day > mind-control

I always thought it was neat how some super heroes in comic books can use mind control. Well, I thought it was more than neat. I went and did my Ph.D. in neuroscience to try to figure out if it was possible.

Unfortunately I found it's not really possible. Well, at least not yet. But I found something similar.

I've been working with a technique called EMG where you change how your brain works using magnets. Most people use it to do things like try to get 5% less depressed, but not me. I was after mind control.

It took some time to target the right brain areas, with the right frequencies. And, like I said, I didn't figure out actual mind control. But what I did accomplish was making people feel like they agreed with whatever was happening. It's kind of like mind control. Now when I started, the EMG machine was huge. You had to get somebody to sit in a chair and put their head in a ring. That's not very close to a super power. So I became friends with grad students in a couple of engineering labs. A couple of years later, and we had miniaturized my EMG machine down to a handheld size. It wasn't perfect, but I had my mind control gun now!

It was time to take it out for some real world testing!

I went to an ice cream shop first and ordered an ice cream sandwich.

The young cashier rung me up, "$3.29, please."

I aimed my "mind control" gun at her, discretely under my coat, and turned it on. "I think you want to give it to me for free."

She agreed, and I walked out with my free ice cream. Awesome!

I walked to the book store and tried it again. Success!

After my exciting day, I sped home in my car. I felt overwhelmed with the number of schemes I'd have to come up with. I was completely lost in thought, until I noticed the flashing lights in my rear view mirror. A cop. Crap! I guess I was a little too excited. I was beating myself up about speeding, but then I remember I could fix this too.

"License and registration."

I grabbed the mind control gun; this was going to be fun.

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On January 10th at 6:52PM, Officer Riley executed a routine traffic stop on the southbound I-405. The officer approached the vehicle on the driver's side and requested license and registration. The suspect was observed grabbing what appeared to be a handgun. Officer Riley gave a verbal warning to put the gun down. The suspect ignored the warning and proceeded to aim the gun at the officer's head. Officer Riley fired three shots at the suspect at point-blank range. Our investigation has concluded and we find that Officer Riley applied an appropriate level of force. No further actions are indicated.